Why Marriage, Part 2
One of my lovely commenters said on my last post about why I chose marriage that “there’s something very powerful about speaking as a married person to say that you support marriage equality and are not threatened by it.” I’ve been mulling over this for some time, not really understanding what is so powerful about taking advantage of privilege. Then, as I was reading some news articles the other day, it dawned on me.
So many people who continually vote, speak, and work against marriage equality are married.
I mean, come on. People constantly talk about “protecting the sanctity of marriage.” We have the Defense of Marriage Act. Just look at this rhetoric: Defending the sanctity of marriage by keeping LGBTQ people out of it.
But to be married and to vote, speak, and work for marriage equality – that is powerful, considering the rhetoric. Marriage shouldn’t be some exclusive club. It should be inclusive of all who fall in love and choose to share their lives with someone else. I am entering marriage, but I don’t feel the need to exclude couples from it just because they don’t fit in to an ancient view of it.
I’m getting married, and I’m defending marriage. For everyone. I’m also defending love, commitment, happiness, and human rights. And I think that’s really important for people to see.
People focus on the fact if someone wants to get married nobody should tell them no. But has anyone ever considered if it is a different kind of relationship? I’m not saying I’m against gay marriage but I’m unsure if I am for it. Why though I never hear anyone say that gay marriage is different than hetero marriage? A key function to marriage is reproducing and ignoring that makes it apparent people don’t know what marriage is. I’m not saying that gay marriage should be ignored and doesn’t deserve a place for openly and publicly committing themselves to someone for life but I don’t know if it is the same institution heterosexual couples share. To ignore what marriage is and to make up what the individual thinks it is takes away the power of marriage. Furthermore, who tries to join a club that they don’t meet the requirements for but still persist on joining because ‘others get to do it and that is unfair?’ I said I’m unsure if if I’m for or against gay marriage but being reasonable about what marriage stands for is outweighing what is to be fair to everyone or pro gay marriage.